Dear corazon of mine: would you please shut up? You are driving me insane with the constant chatter, I am starting to find really irritating the pounding on the ears. Yes yes I know, you miss talking to her until dawn, and having her around just to share time and space but this is getting ridiculous.
I mean I understand and I feel for you but this is getting out of hand, yes her voice resides inside my head, and I see her eyes everywhere and when the sun hits in a full front assault I can only see the color of her hair reflected on. But still that is no reason to drive me insane remember I am the one carrying you around. You are like a lump of hot coal trapped inside an iron box, burning forever more feverishly.
Yes I miss her too, but this constant adrenaline rush, and the infinite loop of memory is not helping anyone. Yes I miss her voice, and the touch of her fingertips when we accidentally touch, and looking into those deep eyes and realize that she’s everything that I could possibly ever ask the heaven for a partner. Yes, I miss the conversations, and the way she makes me feel, and her laugh, and those little details on her skin, a starred sky of freckles, and I am not even going to mention the little two holes in her back because the last time I did I think I died a little knowing I couldn’t gaze upon them at will.
What do you want me to do? I mean I could just go and try again but what’s the point, God as my witness I did all you asked to no avail.
The rush of blood, this feeling of devoid sense is ludicrous, even for you, dear corazon of mine.
So I will say it again even tho I know you will pay no heed:
Just shut up, for a while, for both of our sakes.
To learn patience is not to rebel against every hardshipHenri Nouwen